rain collector

Met up with some of the Lim family. i was told that my cousin is planning to get married, earlier than his older brother. It was a sudden thing. The first thing that came to my mind was 'shotgun'. Muahaha!! Sterotyping people again. He's going to get married to an Australian. We tried asking my uncle whether the girl's angmoh but i suspect he was on the high.

we: is she an angmoh?
uncle: australian
we: so angmoh la?
uncle: australian

You know australian can come in different forms. Our question is whether she's caucasian. ANG MOH! she can be australian born chinese or the aborigines of australia what... See what alcohol does to your brain. it detroys your nerve cells and retards you.

so, i'll be attending two weddings in one year. Haha!

and i saw fireworks at marina bay today! Cool!

Somebody said something which made me quite uncomfortable. she said something like 'we're ok with whatever things you order as long as you pay the bills '. i think they are leeching. Well... i pity my dad for having to live under one roof with four women. But what can i do? it's his choice what...

i guess i'm uncomfortable with the idea of my dad financially supporting people other than me. Is it a form of jealousy?

guess it's time to reinforce my position. I don't expect much from my parents. Sometimes i do pity them. They are sandwiched between me and their spouses. Therefore i have no heart to further worsen the situation.And i pity us for behaving like strangers although they are the reasons why i came to this earth. See the irony? They don't really know what's up in my life and neither do i make the initiative to tell them nor do they take the initiative to ask.

Here comes the cruel part... as long as they are supporting me financially, i'm alright with it. But, this is reality. I can survive without their care or love (not that they don't love me, just not enough or it's being over-ridden) but i can't survive without their money.

Like the other time i went back to hall to pack my stuff home. While i was returning keys to the hall's office, my mum and husband went to wait for me in the canteen. At first i wanted to treat them to drinks to show my gratitude for their help but they had already ordered drinks and food . (they didn't order for me) My mum asked whether i wanted anything after that but i pretended i wasn't hungry. The truth is, i was a tinge angry. i still think it's true like which parent wouldn't ask their children what they want to eat first before ordering right? But i was honestly sick of hall canteen's food that time as well. So i didn't feel like eating. Well...

That's how my parents are. It's either i accept it or i hate them.

And i choose to 看开点吧...

as long as i love myself more. And be contented with the love i receive.

and oh... i'm not exactly emo cause i've accept it long ago.